It's not every day you're harassed by a crazy old woman who resembles, just a little too closely, the ugly witch from "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs." (For the record, this isn't an exaggeration...6 people thought the same thing without even discussing it.) I think it mostly had to do with the folded wrinkles on her face, perfectly indented on each side where she's been sucking in cigarettes for the past 100 years. She approached our table on a sidewalk in Paris and, after saying something that resembled no language I've ever heard, we assumed that the cigarette hanging from her mouth, broken in half and therefore of questionable usefulness, meant she was asking us for a light. John attempted to light it but failed due to the fact that he was trying to stay as far away from the woman as possible, and also because she didn't have the strength in her lips to suck in when the light was finally close enough. He kept saying (in English, which I'm sure she understood), "Dude, you're gonna have to do it yourself! Dude, it's not catching!" Finally, the cigarette caught some fire...however, as soon as it did, it fell from her muscle-less mouth and hardly missed hitting her claw-shaped hand before falling to the ground. A look of despair came over her face. Then, in what seemed to be slow-motion, she took her claw-like hand and stretched it toward the sandwich on John's tray. He slapped her hand away as he exclaimed, "Dude! Whoa, what are you doing?! You're gonna have to get out of here...go away, dude." Again, a look of despair and defeat came over her face. It might have been sad if I wasn't laughing so hard. Just as I was getting over the claw-grab, I looked up to see a perfectly tear-shaped drop of snot fall from her nose to the table, without her even noticing. After this, I completely lost it...I was laughing so hard I was crying, and so were the other 5 people at the table. She began to walk away but, just when we thought we were done with her, she took a seat at the other end of the table, just next to Even (pronounced Evan...don't ask, he's Norwegian). The comments were flying: "Even, hide your wallet, " "Everyone hold onto their food," etc. Then, out of nowhere, she began to cackle...no, she wasn't laughing...she was CACKLING. After sufficiently scaring the crap out of us, she stood up and walked away, floppy baby pink stocking cap and all, and it wasn't more than 10 steps before she was harassing another innocent table at the next café. We spent the next hour trying to figure out what kind of curse she most likely put on us with that evil laugh.
The crazy people in France just seem to be crazier than the crazy Americans...well, either that or they just go out more. Who knows.
Okay, so to backtrack and explain who we were eating breakfast with. Last weekend, I went to Paris with Grace, Margo and Rachel. On Saturday night, we went out and met a group of 2 American guys and a Norwegian who are living and working in Belgium this year (John, Karmac, and Even). It was really fun to hang out with American guys again (aka, guys that would refer to an old crazy woman as "dude"), and it was fun to talk to Even and compare my experiences with Norwegian culture to his life in "real" Norway. The first words I spoke to him were "Kan du snakke norsk?", which means "Can you speak Norwegian?" I know, convenient phrase as I would have no idea what to respond back. The good news is that he was so surprised I could even say that phrase that we immediately began discussing all things Norwegian! The other good news is that he offered to be my tour guide anytime I go to Norway...so, Mom, maybe we need to start planning that trip!
I'm now finishing up with my classes...due to the 2 week vacation that starts this Friday, I will only see each of my classes one more time. It's a strange feeling to be so close to the end...the time after Christmas has really flown by. I will be spending the break on the east coast of Spain (Barcelona, Valencia and Alicante) with some friends, so I'll have a good opportunity to practice my basic Spanish! (Actually, I don't even think I'm at a level that could be called basic...whatever's below that.)
Well, I'm sure there's a lot more to update on, but this will have to do for now :). Miss you all and can't wait to see most of you in May!
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